What I Said When He Told Me
Of course itâs okay with me, I told him. But he was to change his mind half a dozen times in the next six months about pursuing his change or his âcoming out,â so to speak. He didnât want to upset the neighbors, his family, his children. He didnât want to ruffle my feathers or embarrass me at all.
Itâs so hard to describe how I felt when he explained this. It was a mixture of anger, rebellion, and sadness. What a gentle giant. . . such a giving, compassionate, kind person he was prepared to sacrifice his health and longevity for his family.
I think I felt anger, rebellion, and sadness because he was actually prepared to just exist in his designated male body and put up with the self-loathing to appease his family, the masses, society, whoever. It was hard to explain to him that if he didnât step up and express himself and simply be the most fabulous person that he ever could be, it would surely crush him and rot him from the inside out.
Heâs my soulmate, my other half, my right arm. I wouldnât be able to breathe without him, regardless of whether heâs wearing a skirt or a shirt and tie. Ridiculous labels society sets up for people.
I do believe he gets it now. Six different times, he decided against pursuing the life-changing hormones that would ultimately change his appearance from masculine to feminine. And each time he tried to go against his grain, in our home, he would turn into a grumpy, nasty fool who was entirely odious to be anywhere near.
Womens Hormones: The Main Culprits For Changes In Your Health
Whether its lower energy, weight gain, irritability, decreased sex drive or other symptoms, as many women approach 40 years of age or older, they report feeling different. While many women are quick to blame their hormones for the differences they begin experiencing, its important to know that hormones are not always the catalyst for these changes. In our experience, the majority of women who report these problems are actually suffering from stress and lifestyle-related choices, rather than hormonal shifts.
At Moreland OB-GYN, our team of obstetricians/gynecologists has the expertise to help you identify the true causes for why you may feel different, guide you through perimenopause and the stages of menopause, and make sure you are putting your best foot forward in terms of your overall health. But first, lets take a look at the primary hormones at work in a womans body.
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It Will Make Him Respect Your Authority
This goes beyond playing dress-up with your husband it messes with his psyche. Dressing him up to expose part of his body to please you while you don’t have to wear anything revealing to get his attention would make him more submissive.
Let him wear the high heels for a change. If the roles were reversed, it would not feel so good to be treated like all there is to you is your body. Putting a guy in this position would make him respect the authority of a woman.
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What I Think And Feel About It Now
What Iâm scared of is how am I going to feel when his body changes?
How am I going to feel when he starts to lose his muscly physique and starts growing breasts?
How is it really going to impact me when he has the sex change operation?
I donât know the answers to any of those questions. But what I do know is that I truly canât breathe without him. The very best I can do is to take each minute as it comes and just put my best foot forward and help him with all my heart to find himself. Everybody deserves to feel fabulous in their own body.
Of course, Iâm also nervous about the possibility of having our house or car torched by ignorant individuals who are completely oblivious to anything other than their opinion. . . but whatâs the point of panicking if it hasnât happened yet?
They say that 99% of what you worry about never happens. Both of us are big believers in eliminating the brain chatter and rising above the situation with the power of positivity, so maybe we will glide through this effortlessly. I do truly believe that we canât change the way other people think or behave, and the only way to deal with negativity and hatred from others is not to react. Donât feed their anger. And move on. . . but all of this is preemptive.
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If Youre Looking For Contraception
If youre a cisgender man whos interested in contraception, hormonal birth control pills intended for people with uteruses wont work for you. They wont prevent pregnancy.
If youre a transgender man, you can use hormonal birth control, regardless of whether youre taking testosterone.
Hormonal birth control and testosterone can be used together.
Both will still be effective, and doing so shouldnt produce any uncomfortable or harmful effects.
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Would It Do Anything
It depends on whos taking it and why.
This is because some transgender men have bottom surgery and other gender-confirming surgeries, while others do not.
Transgender men who take hormonal birth control will find that it affects them similarly to how it affects cisgender women.
Many transgender men undergo hormone therapy, which is when youre given hormonal treatments to change your secondary sex characteristics.
This can cause you to grow facial hair and develop a deeper voice, for example.
Whether youre on testosterone or not, hormonal birth control can be used to prevent pregnancy and to help with other reproductive issues, such as heavy periods.
For cisgender men, taking hormonal birth control is a little different.
If you accidentally take one or even a few pills, nothing is likely to happen. But if you keep taking contraceptives, it can cause some changes to your body over time.
Long-term use of estrogen-based contraception can cause the breast tissue to develop. It can affect your sex drive and fertility.
Lets consider the definition of the word man. Many people think of men as having penises, and subsequently unable to become pregnant.
However, transgender men who may have vaginas and may be able to become pregnant are men.
Men specifically transgender men can actually get pregnant, even if theyre undergoing hormone therapy and taking testosterone.
Many transgender men take hormonal birth control to avoid pregnancy.
Friends Partners And Lovers: What It Takes To Make Your Marriage Work
Most marriages survive by gritting teeth and holding on. But marriages can and will not only survive but thrive when husbands and wives learn to cherish one another. Those are the powerful words of bestselling author Gary Thomas in his newest bookCherish. And in a world desperate for marriage redemption, it is needed now more than ever. Thomas shows that although there are a countless number of marriages consisting of two people just going through the motions, there are real ways this pattern can be reversed: when husbands and wives learn to cherish one another in proven, loving, and everyday actions and words.
Newest Release – Episode 2: Heroes Providing Hope
Discover the amazing work our PRCs Directors, Nurses, and Volunteers are making in their communities! Youll see firsthand testimonies of a PRC in action, and that there are other options outside of abortions! Youll also discover how your family can support your local PRC!
Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!
Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!
Newest Release – Episode 4: Sometimes the Choice is Hard
Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!
Newest Release – Episode 3: The Power of a Picture
Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!
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How Can Oxytocin Positively Affect Your Behaviors
Oxytocin may help your body adapt to a number of different emotional and social situations.
Intranasal oxytocin has been directly linked to enhanced communication between romantic partners particularly during arguments.
Research from 2010 also shows that intranasal oxytocin may help people with autism better understand and respond to social cues.
Dr Tim And Mrs Noreen Muehlhoff
Dr. Tim Muehlhoff is a professor of communication at Biola University in La Mirada, California where he teaches classes in family communication, interpersonal communication, apologetics, gender, and conflict resolution. Tim and his wife, Noreen, are both on staff with Biolas Center for Marriage and Relationships where he is a co-host of The Art of Relationship podcast.
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A Very Serious Warning Before You Begin
Please, please, please understand that this advice is intended only for the seriously gender dysphoric and those who understand that they are transsexual. If you have any doubt at all about your transsexuality do not seek out hormone replacement therapy and contact a therapist to discuss your situation. Many universities offer therapy to the general population on a sliding scale. There is a high cost for those who transition but are not transsexuals and Lynn Conway explains this better than I can.
Also understand that it is highly recommended that you consult a doctor at all stages of your transition to ensure that you are doing the right thing, being monitored for any abnormalities that hormone replacement therapy may cause and that you are physically fit and able to have any therapy that you seek.
In summary:
Can Oxytocin Produce A Similar Effect In Regards To Fatherhood
Theres evidence that parenthood stimulates the release of oxytocin in fathers, too.
One 2010 study found that specific types of interaction between father and baby led to higher oxytocin levels. This includes directing the babys attention toward certain objects and encouraging the baby to explore.
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Giving Up Sugar Tasting God’s Goodness
As a latchkey kid, Wendy Speake turned to sugar for comfort. Every Friday, she would pedal to the candy show and use her allowance to fill her bag with candy. And one day, when she was older and a mom of three young boys, she came to realize that she was still pedaling away from her stress and using sugar as comfort, instead of turning to Jesus. She was joyless, worn out, tired, and in need of a change. In this interview, Wendy will challenge Christians to take 40 days to focus on fasting from something they turn to instead of Jesus for comfort. She invited people to break free from a dependence on sugar and taste the goodness of God.
How To Deal With Hormonal Imbalances That Affect Your Marriage
One day the emotions Id been suppressing spilled out. As I unloaded on my husband, Steve, I knew my words hurt him. But I didnt stop.
Finally he asked, What are you saying? Do you want me to leave?
Why should you leave? I sobbed. Maybe I should go.
As the words left my mouth, even I couldnt understand why I said them. I adored Steve. Hes the love of my life. But Id become a miserable mess. For months Id been spiraling downward and I knew it. I just didnt know what to do about it. And I couldnt adequately explain to Steve how I felt.
During this time Id often give our new baby to our older daughter and turn on a movie for our toddler so I could hide in my room and plead with God for help. But God was silent. I felt alone, afraid and ashamed of being unable to shake the cloud over me.
Steves concerns grew when he came home from work to find me weeping. He let me cry. Then he said, Babe, Ive known you forever. Youre just not you anymore. Whats going on?
I wanted to get mad at Steve, but I knew he was right. Id always been a joyful, laugh-out-loud kind of girl. I loved life. And I deeply loved my husband and children.
The sudden change occurred after our third child was born. I didnt know it then, but I had postpartum depression, which turned into a hormonal imbalance causing monthly PMS.
Imagine you were a werewolf, I said to Steve. And every full moon you were going to turn into a werewolf whether you liked it or not.
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What Does A Woman Want From A Husband
A woman wants love and affection from her husband someone who would miss her when she’s gone on a holiday or to work. She wants a partner who would support her dreams and encourage her to achieve them. On top of this, a woman wants a husband who is a friend, one who would be her shoulder to cry on. The ideal husband would be the guy who understands and treats her lovingly.
Navigating A Toxic Culture With Your Daughter
As a pediatrician, Dr. Meg Meeker has seen thousands of girls come through her office through the years. They struggle with eating issues, sexual identity, social mediaand many other challenges in this toxic culture. Dr. Meeker will encourage parents to invest love and time in their daughters and develop their character to give them the best opportunity for a bright future, all rooted in a spiritual foundation. The discussion also includes healthy feminism vs. toxic feminism
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The Bi Girl Whose Boyfriend Is About To Start Taking Hormones
New Yorks Sex Diaries series asks anonymous city dwellers to record a week in their sex lives with comic, tragic, often sexy, and always revealing results. This week, a 22-year-old gallerist, bisexual, Harlem.
DAY ONE
12 a.m. In bed alone, on my third glass of wine. I work at an art gallery, and sometimes the days leading up to an exhibition opening almost break me. Today was more than enough to make me forgo the gym in favor of the trifecta: Mad Men , red wine, and TJs dark-chocolate-salted almonds.
12:10 a.m. Wes just called and we caught up on our days he is 23 and in politics and lazily talked about what wed do to each other if we were in the same bed. We were a couple for almost two years pre-trans, but he never looked like a woman. Quite androgynous. He didnt come out to me until about four months ago, after he had a series of revelations about his gender. He wasnt out as trans to himself or anyone else. Its all much hotter now better orgasms, nice toys, and we really know each others bodies. I balance my glass of wine on my belly button and talk to him while he touches himself.
1:15 a.m. I come back from the bathroom and spot my neighbor across the alley, a few floors down. Hes sorting his laundry, totally naked. It makes me miss Wes. I feel a little voyeuristic, but also hes the one without curtains on his bedroom windows. An image pops into my head of myself holding up a T-Swift-style sign at my bedroom window. Lol. Good night.
DAY TWO
Effective Habits To Embrace In Parenting
To be an effective parent, you must be a leader in your childs life, guiding with a gentle hand and setting a solid example. Dr. Randy Schroeder provides the insight you need to be a leader-parent. As he explores the foundational Rsrelationship, routines, responsibilities, and rulesyoull better understand the role you play in your childs life. Youll learn great phrases to employ such as Either/Or/You Decide and When You/Then You. While there is no perfect parent, this nuts-and-bolts material will equip you to lead your child in a loving, confident manner.
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Adrenal Imbalances In Men And Women
The adrenal glands produce three types of steroid hormones: glucocorticoids , mineralocorticoids , and androgens . Cortisol enables the body to respond and adapt to the stresses of daily life. It also helps to maintain blood sugar levels and promote a healthy immune system. Aldosterone works to balance salt and water in the body. Androgens secreted by the adrenals provide the majority of DHEA for women. For women, the adrenal glands are the major source of testosterone. Imbalances in the adrenal system can contribute to problems with the nervous and immune systems, body composition difficulties, blood sugar irregularities, and high androgen levels.
With Help Of A Parent Or Guardian
This is the easy and safe way. I really hope you will come out to your family and have them help you with medical transition.
The only reasons to get these drugs without their help is if you might get
- another family member who wont help you
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The Spiritual Battle For Your Marriage
God designed marriage to reflect His love to the world and because of this, the enemy wants to destroy Gods beautiful design. Based on his book, Defending Your Marriage, Dr. Tim and Noreen Muehlhoff share about the reality of spiritual warfare against marriages, and how to combat the enemys lies with the truth of God. Couples will be encouraged that theyre not alone in the fight for a godly marriage and better equipped to be a shining example for the world around them.